Here you are, walking about the world, thinking you are important. You’re on your way to discovering your purpose and living your purpose and then you realize the answer to that question is whomever employs you. How silly. To realize that you grew up to become a job. You’re not so much a person who has dreams and wonderings and curiosities, but a thing that needed to make itself useful. Of course we need to be useful. That is our purpose. However, the hope is to realize purpose is not employment, albeit the “lucky ones” count their blessings by saying “if you can get paid for what you love, it isn’t work at all.”
Then there are the small moments. And those are the moments that we need to cherish the most. Sometimes they piss us off because those small moments are useless and wasted on people who have nothing of value to contribute. And so you’re stressed over paying bills from a job you don’t quite enjoy but that is your identity every time you introduce yourself. Don’t forget the small moments. The moments that got you there. The moments that got you through. The moments that will lead you beyond this moment you don’t feel is valuable.
We are all unique. And in that uniqueness all of us happen to be less important than the next person. When we consider our own uniqueness, our individuality, our distinct personalities are considerably more significant to ourselves than the struggling soul beside us. What we would do for others is not always what they would do for us. In this, we forget the gravity of other peoples lives and the circumstances that prevent them from valuing us during our hardships.
Here you are, walking around the world, thinking you’re important. But what do you think is important about that you walking around the world? What does the world need to reflect back to you to validate the existence you’ve created?
A friend of mine recently went through a period of reflection after a series of unfortunate events. They surmise that after almost 40 years of life they hadn’t learned anything from their parents and, being on their second marriage, were going to finally get it right. However, what I noticed was that nothing had changed save for their new spouse being called Daddy which had never been said outside of their own father. So I considered that instead of progress, this person was regressing and using new information to validate their need for codependency. They might think this situation unique, but it may make them more unimportant. I understand the need for partnership and to feel safe and loved, but there is something valuable in being a partner to yourself, loving yourself (again).
We go through cycles. Patterns that map our life. Every handful of years, seven, 10, 15, we shift. It’s this shift that we need to embrace. Flexibility. Allowing ourselves to remember we will be confronted by change everyday and must respond in kind. Let’s not forget, it’s that uniqueness that predicts how you’ll respond to this ever changing life. It’s that uniqueness that should help you recall each life is unique and, oh so, unimportant in the scheme of things.